Q. My childbirth instructor says it’s not pain I’ll feel during labour, but pressure. Is she right?
A. Yes, in the same way that a tornado might be called an air current.
Q. The more heavily pregnant I get, the more strangers smile at me. Why is that?
A. Because you’re fatter than them.
Q. Is there anything I should avoid while recovering from childbirth?
A. Yes, pregnancy.
Q. Our baby was born last week. When will I begin to feel normal again?
A. When the kids are in college.
Q. My wife is five months pregnant and so moody that sometimes she’s crazy and irrational.
A. So what’s your question?